Beyond the Vote: Helping Kids Make Sense of Election Emotions

When the election results came in on Wednesday morning, I was a thousand miles away from my boys, attending a clinical conference. I woke up in a beautiful yet soulless hotel room, and my heart sank—I longed to be at the breakfast table with them, experiencing the news together. Election results can impact our sense of identity and worth, especially when we don’t feel fully represented. As a bicultural woman and mother, I had my own feelings to process but as their parent, I needed to project equanimity and strength. This is what they needed most.

In such a politically charged climate, our kids will continue to absorb messages from school, friends, social media, and even other parents. But my boys (even if secretly) still look to their dad and me to make sense of it all. What do these results and the feelings they’ve triggered mean? And how should we behave in a society that seems so divided?

This is where we come in—not only to explain, but to model grace, whether we’re pleased or disappointed. In the coming weeks and months, we must help our kids explore their own emerging values and feelings in ways that serve their growth and the greater good. If we do it right, they’ll be compassionate, resilient citizens when it's their turn to decide an election.  

Respecting Their Emotions

Kids this age could feel disappointed, angry, or hopeful about election outcomes, and frustrated for not being given a voice in the decision. No matter where their reactions stem from, these emotions deserve validation. Inflectioners are figuring out what matters to them, and a supportive family is their safe place to explore. Let them know it’s okay to feel a range of emotions and even if they feel disheartened by the results, their voices matter and that they will soon have the right to use them.

Encouraging expression, whether through discussion, art, or writing, helps your kid process complex emotions and better understand that it’s possible to work through uncertainty. Remind them that emotions can motivate positive action—and that every great leader was once a kid figuring things out, just like them.

Helping Kids Process Without Swaying Them

It’s a delicate dance to inform and empower kids at this age and in this political climate. Right now, inflection-age children are forming identities separate from us and encountering concepts like democracy, leadership, and social justice without the historical or contextual knowledge to fully grasp them. Exploring these structures and ideas brings them into contact with opinions at school, online, and yes, from us. It’s natural to share our perspectives with our kids but it’s important to also let them process this news on their terms.

Ask open-ended questions about what they heard and felt about the election like, "What was your school saying about the results?" or, "Did anything you heard surprise you?" and really listen to their thoughts. By discussing instead of lecturing, you’re teaching kids the art of respectful, inquisitive dialogue—a critical skill, and not just in politics.

Cultivating Empathy and Civic Responsibility

Because campaigns and elections are inherently divisive, they present an opportunity for us to talk to our kids about empathy and the importance of listening to diverse opinions. Explain that the democratic process thrives when people feel free to speak up, and yes, disagree respectfully. I tell my boys that we are all human at the end of the day, and we’re here to help each other through life’s ups and downs.

Finally, remind your kids that it will be their turn soon. Their generation’s voice will shape the future! Encouraging their curiosity, empathy, and confidence now prepares them for the day when they’ll stand up and make their voices heard—for themselves and the world they’ll help lead. 

Meeting the Next Chapter 

I often feel a big weight on my shoulders trying to guide my boys through this divided moment when I have so few answers. What do I know? Most days not much! That’s why I lean so heavily on sharing stories of people who’ve inspired positive change in difficult times. Think Fred Rogers and Empathy. Then, through my own behavior, I try to show my boys how to stay grounded, compassionate, and resilient. By the way, this is not always easy when I have my own emotions to contend with when it comes to the election! Ultimately, if our kids are to become the engaged, thoughtful adults we’re raising them to be, they need to believe in the power of individuals to build understanding, inclusive worlds—and that they’re never alone in navigating the big questions. Show them these things are true.